He's Fire And Ice And Rage

Reward is in the risk.

Follows this rp and this ficlet.

The Doctor did not want to go to a party. He was beginning to despise parties, especially ones where he had to get dressed up and pretend he was enjoying himself. Parties where he was expected to be somebody. Private soirees were all right once in a while, but that's all they were held; once in a while. The big parties seemed too happen once every few weeks, if not more often.

Tonight, it was a garden party. Louis and Marie were throwing it in their gardens and everyone who was anyone was invited. The Doctor imagined his name was merely attached to Reinette (which was all right by him).

Except, Reinette had left much earlier in the day to spend time with her once-lover, while the Doctor stayed in his room, staring at the ceiling and thinking of the night before. What had that meant, her standing there in her room and looking at him? Was he thinking too much into it? What about when she told him he could've asked her rather than had that night with the girl at the ball?

He eventually got up, dressed, and tugged his hair into a short ponytail at the nape of his neck with an elaborate clasp. The carriage ride was both uneventful and, without Reinette's conversation, uninteresting. He wanted to ask her about what happened. He wanted to know if things had changed.

No, no, he wasn't completely idiotic. He knew something had changed. Something was changing. He just didn't know exactly what.

He took a cup of chilled wine and wandered the garden. The September air was crisp and the leaves were changing color, but most of the flowers still held bloom. It wasn't a terrible place to hold a party. If only it wasn't so frightfully pretentious.

There's a first time for everything.

Follows this.

He couldn't sleep, of course. It wasn't as if he'd truly tried. He'd stripped off his clothes, showered, shaved, puttered about in his jim-jams, but never really found his way to his own bed. His arm didn't hurt nearly so bad anymore, but he couldn't seem to stop his stomach from aching. Too much had gone on. His room felt far too empty.

As with most nights, he wandered the TARDIS alone. Rose slept a ridiculous amount of time and there was always so much to do. Still, tonight he just put the kettle on and made some tea and watched it get cold without drinking any. He wished that he could've saved Rose's friend. His friend, in some ways. He felt as if he'd failed. And he worried about Rose. She looked heartbroken and that made failure worse. His failure hurt her. He should've just focused on the fact that he FAILED and that should've been enough, but it made it that much worse. Just a little bit more to push it over the edge into unbearable.

He left the mug of tea on the table and walked around a little more, felt the TARDIS vibrate beneath his feet. He wandered a few more corridors, eventually finding himself at Rose's door. The TARDIS must've been worried about her, he most certainly wasn't walking in the direction of the bedrooms. Was he? No, no, he wasn't.

She was probably sleeping. It wouldn't hurt to check on her, would it? He gently turned the knob on her door and pressed it open, just a little.

Well show me a friendship that's pure and chaste // And I'll show you and engine that's dying to race

In the entire time that she's been traveling with him, he's gone into her room once, maybe twice. Both times it was to call her to the console room because some sort of something was going on. But since she's discovered the location of his bedroom, she's made it one of her places to find him.

Which is fairly disconcerting, actually. He doesn't like companions knowing where to find him when he really, truly, just wants to hide. And after today? He really does just want to hide.

Everything started out all right. Trip to the 51st century, landed on a spaceship…well, then everything went topsy-turvy. France. Reinette…he had all these great plans for when she was traveling with him. Them. With them. Well, the place was getting a bit blokey anyway, Rose could've used a friend.

And he keeps thinking over that letter in his pocket. A few hours over the course of her lifetime and she died waiting for him. He has had that grief weighing on his hearts since he came back to the TARDIS and he thinks a little alone time won't hurt.

Of course when he gets to his room, there's Rose. Leaning against one of the bedposts and staring over at him. She's in a tank top and shorts which are apparently her improvised set of jim jams. Her hair's brushed out from how she had it done before, but it looks a little ruffled.

"Mickey found his room all right?" he asks, taking off his coat and tossing it over one of the armchairs in the room. He tries to make her think he's not affected by her being in his safe area, but he's certain she knows.

"Yeah, showed him where it was hours ago," she replies.

He loosens his tie. "Hours? Really?"

( Yeah, you've been in the console room a long time. )

Muse: The Doctor
Fandom: Doctor Who
Word Count: 1,664

http://ambitious-woman.livejournal.com/53832.html

Muse: The Doctor (Ten)
Partner: Reinette, ambitious_woman
Starting or Finished? Finished
Security? Public