for quitehomoerotic: Welcome to Christmas Planet

[rude_not_ginger]

Follows this.

The Doctor didn't really like doing things in halves.

So, he promised Jack a proper Christmas, so he plugged the keyword "Christmas" into the randomizer and set the TARDIS to land wherever she deemed would be appropriate. He thought they'd land somewhere on Earth, maybe a classic Victorian Christmas, or one of the neon-light Christmases of 4333. That would be nice.

As she flew, he opened up one of the compartments on the console and quietly tucked away the cufflinks Jack had given him. Sentimental, he'd said before. Sentimental, but they were a gift. For all the Doctor knew, with the Marquis chasing them they might be the last thing he ever got from Jack.

He hoped not.

Ding. The console fell quietly and the Doctor raced over to the monitor.

Not even Earth. Odd.

"Christmas Eve," he said, grinning despite it all. "12136 AD. Not a bad year for Christmases, I think."

Comments

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

After boarding the TARDIS, Jack had circled a few times around the console. Reacclimatising himself. He'd smiled because he couldn't not, and he'd gently laid his fingers along the railing, and smoothed them along it as he walked around.

She hadn't burned him or froze him, stung him or any other little trick like that. If anything the metal felt pleasantly warm under his fingers. Almost inviting.

He was glad to be back.

"Christmas Eve," Jack repeated but then frowned at the year. "Really? What sort of Christmas are we going to get then. Didn't Christmas stop being a formal holiday around about the 34th century? What about the snow and the people walking around dressed as elves?"

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, but that just depends on what quadrant of the universe we're in," the Doctor said. He nodded to the screen. "Were in the holiday quadrant, where nostalgic humans, curious outsiders, and time travelers can pick up all of their holiday necessities. And this is the most important planet of the bunch at the moment."

He hopped around the console and snatched up his coat. "We're on the planet for the holiday."

Outside the door was the largest shopping mall in the universe. Every floor, every building was decorated in white and red and green, with groups of automated droids singing Christmas carols and little kids running around asking what a candy cane was. The planet was warm, but synthetic snow fell from the sky.

"Christmas Planet," the Doctor said. "When I ask the TARDIS for Christmas, she knows how to deliver."

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

"Christmas Planet?" Jack said with a laugh and a wide grin. "She's brought us to Christmas Planet? Well that certainly fills the criteria! Good old TARDIS."

He beamed a smile and made his way towards the doors, turning to walk backwards along the walkway, still looking at the Doctor.

"Hey maybe if you're good I'll take you to see Santa and you can sit on his knee!" Jack suggested, teasing.

"So what is Christmas Planet?" He asked as he took hold of the lock on the door to open it and step outside. "Because I've never heard of it. It some sort of--" when he stepped out, he stalled and looked around.

"Woah."

A droid shaped like a penguin waddled over to him and wished him a Merry Christmas before turning and disappearing back in the direction of the huge facade in front of him. Shaped like a gingerbread house but stories and stories huge.

He grinned. "Oh you have got to come and look at this."

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"No, you should come see this!" the Doctor called over his shoulder. Underneath them was a huge, holographic ice skating rink. It was definitely the latest in holographic technology, as the children skating seemed to be genuinely cold and when they cried out in pain, it was from the ice's genuine hardness.

Electronic reindeer skimmed above them, projected through the air by low-beam rocket boosters. As they passed over their section, the reindeer's stomach compartments opened, raining peppermint candies and chocolate gelt. The Doctor picked a candy off of his shoulder and unwrapped it.

"Not bad, I think," he said, popping the candy into his mouth. "A bit commercialized, but there are levels entirely devoted to Victorian christmases, and 21st century Christmases, and 23rd century Christmases. Quite the festive place."

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Hearing the Doctor's voice, Jack spun his head back around over his shoulder and grinned. He headed quickly over to him to take a look, and reached his hand out to rest naturally against the Doctor's back as he glanced over.

"Nothing by halves, Doctor, with you. It never is."

He beamed wide from ear to ear, and looked sideways at the Doctor.

"Areas dedicated to 21st Century Christmasses?" Jack questioned teasingly, "What do they have most people leaving major cities in case something alien comes along?"

"Right," he said decisively as he tapped the Doctor gently on his back, "lets explore and try and stay out of trouble for once."

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

Oh, no.

"Oh, you had to, didn't you?" the Doctor said, sighing in irritation. "You had to go off and say it. 'Stay out of trouble for once'. You might as well have said 'Nothing could possibly go wrong' or 'Everything's been checked and rechecked'! Now---"

As if on cue, there was a loud scream from the level above them. Someone shouting something that might've been 'help', but seemed garbled. The Doctor shot an accusatory glare at Jack, and then made a run for the escalators.

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack grinned his very best 'naughty schoolboy' grin over at the Doctor. Could it be that he'd said that quite on purpose? Would he do such a thing?

Of course he would.

With a little laugh Jack started running at a fast pace behind the Doctor.

"Well," he called from behind him, "we have to keep things interesting, don't we?"

It made a warm feeling course through Jack's veins. Danger, adventure, running. Just how things should be.

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

The Doctor would've been lying if he said he was absolutely furious about Jack's words or the consequences of them. He loved Christmas, but part of Christmas was always the inevitable adventure that followed. He turned back to Jack as he hopped up the escalator, giving him a wide grin.

At the top of the escalator was...nobody. Nobody at all. Just one wide, empty hallway with shopping bags strewn about and shops open but empty. The Doctor glanced over the edge to the lower floors. Plenty of people there, just not one on this floor.

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack stalled in his sprint as he reached the top of the long escalators. It was silent but for the distant sound of Christmas music playing on the floors below and a vague echo as a bauble fell from a tree a few feet away, smashing as it hit the floor.

"Okaaay," Jack said, taking a step forward. "Call me crazy but I doubt this is right."

He peered inside a doorway. Bags were left half packed, a digital-credit reader left halfway through a transaction for someone apparently called Nit.

Shoving his hands into his pockets he walked back to the Doctor. "It's like everyone just disappeared."

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"But only on this level," the Doctor said, gingerly stepping around a bag. "And only in the last couple of seconds."

The sound of laughing from the floors below continued, along with a highly stylized version of 'Jingle Bells' pouring through one of the loudspeakers.

"Not even a mouse," the Doctor pointed out, toeing a discarded coffee cup.

There was a crash down the hall and without any hesitation, the Doctor bolted towards it.

"This way!"

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack flicked open the cover on his wrist strap and poked away at a button or two. Nothing seemed abnormal, other than the obvious of course. No strange readings or tell tale signs.

Bouncing forth like a spring Jack followed behind the Doctor. The sound let them along down the centre of the mall, feet echoing off the red marbled floor and through faux falling snow. The corridor seemed endless. Shops on either side, all open and empty. All ready and waiting for their customers.

"You have any idea what could have done this?" he asked as he ran along.

"Some sort of low level restricted teleport or something? But no I mean, there's no residue in the air, not that I could see at least. It's like they all ran away."

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"Ran away and left everything behind," the Doctor agreed. He stopped as the sound ahead of them seemed to vanish. He sniffed the air. "There's not even a charge from a dimensional shift or a rift confusion, it's like they never were."

Which was impossible. They knew there were people up here...weren't there? Maybe they hadn't been. The Doctor and Jack had only just arrived, after all.

He knelt down and touched the handle of a woman's handbag. "Still warm."

A tinny, non-religious version of 'the Christmas Shoes' began to play over the intercom, and the Doctor felt a chill run up his spine. There was something distinctly wrong here, beyond the obvious.

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack bent down to touch the floor and looked up at the Doctor beside him as he stood.

"It doesn't make sense," he said, stating the obvious. "It's like they've been removed. I mean, the other floors aren't effected and the amount of people up here there'd have at least been some sort of rush or something. Some sort of disturbance. But no, look at it."

It was as though they'd been taken. But what could do that, and why?

He looked at his manipulator again. Nothing. And no alert.

"It couldn't be the Marquis, could it?" Jack asked, and tried to keep worry back from his voice. He didn't think it could be, but it had to be something.

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

The Doctor immediately fished for his own detector. He shook his head.

"He hasn't even sent out a signal to trace you yet, much less started chasing. No." He snapped the detector shut. "No, this is something else. Something bigger."

The Doctor walked over to one of the numerous sets of stairs. There were so many people walking around them, but they never went up or down. Just keeping busy on their own levels.

"Nobody's noticed," he said. "Nobody but us."

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

"Well that's something," Jack said, though he didn't really feel comforted by the fact. It was just good to know that wasn't something they were going to have to deal with for a while.

"So maybe this started before we got here," Jack theorised. "Whatever this is."

He looked down one of the stairwells and watched as people milled around below. A child ran along in excitement, a parent chasing behind.

"Maybe that's why we can see it. Or maybe there's something different about us? Or maybe we're way off. Maybe this is normal. Some sort of systematic shut down? Level by level? No but that doesn't make sense. Where did everybody go. It's not like they had time to get anywhere before we got here."

Out of the corner of his eye, Jack saw something shimmer. He thought it might be the reflection off some tinsel, but he wasn't sure that it was.

He looked to the Doctor and spoke his name in hushed tones. "Over here."

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

The Doctor didn't catch what Jack did, but he knew his companion well enough to know that he wasn't wrong when he caught things. He kept his head towards the stairwell, but followed Jack with a nod.

"Considering the number of people who should be moving through this place, I'm surprised we're the only ones who have seen. Or, maybe we aren't. Maybe that's what that scream was when we first arrived."

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the sonic, switching it quickly to the blue setting. Less dangerous in running situations, that setting."

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

"Yeah and if someone else did notice, then where did they go? And who shut them up?"

As they began to move further along the corridor, the distant sound of 'Jingle Bells' playing could be heard. A track that sounded like it was sung by Chipmunks on acid but slowed down. Like the batteries were running out.

It came from a merry go round a few feet away. It still turned and the horses (or rather aptly, reindeer) gently bobbed up and down.

"Okay, well that's not at all creepy," Jack said with more than a hefty helping of sarcasm.

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

Hahahahaahahahaa! The Doctor spun around as a stuffed Santa display burst into laughter, its lit-up eyes blazing where only a moment ago there had been stillness.

"No," the Doctor said in a voice that squeaked a little with worry. "No, not creepy at all can we start going this way, please?"

He started down the hall, but as he did, the displays began lighting up again, the musical tracks that had been quiet suddenly whirring to life in a cacophony of holiday spirit.

But there was something else. Something under that noise. A clomping of high-heeled shoes, somewhere ahead. The Doctor turned around to Jack and nodded forward before proceeding, quickly.

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack covered his mouth with a hand to try and hide his laughter as the Doctor was shaken by the admittedly very evil and deeply scary (in no way at all) Santa.

He didn't hide it very well.

"Course we can," Jack said, the amusement evident in his voice before he cleared his throat to try again a little more seriously, "Course we can."

Following a step or two behind the Doctor Jack looked around and frowned slightly as the shops and sounds all started to burst back into life. He looked back to the Doctor and acknowledged his nod with one of his own, stepping up his pace a little to an almost jog as they advanced.

The lights around them started to brighten. Silent little elves burst back into song and the hum of songs all mixed together into an odd sort of din.

Instinct told Jack to reach for his gun, but he held back. Held back for now, at least.

"Company, Doctor?"

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"Maybe," the Doctor acknowledged with a nod. "Maybe not."

The clomp-clomp got a little quieter, and then stopped. Whoever it was that had been running had stopped. Or been stopped.

He made a face and shook his head. "Oh, who am I kidding? Don't think I've ever had a Christmas where there wasn't some sort of unwanted company."

Another elf burst to life next to the Doctor and he jumped. He turned back to Jack and pointed. "Not a word out of you! You never had to deal with robotic Santas!"

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

Jack's grin when the Doctor looked at him was again stupidly wide, and he lifted his hand to mime a zipping motion over his lips.

The air had a smell. An almost clinical smell. Like the corridors of a hospital from too many layers of bleach and cleaning supplies. It seemed to appear over the mulled wine cinnamon scent that had dominated. It was strange though. oddly artificial, and Jack scrunched his nose up a little.

"Do you smell that?" he asked. "It's like...sodium hydrochloride," Jack said, and then proceeded to immediately nod at the Doctor in a 'get me, I can identify smells too' gesture. "But that's in bleach. Why would they release bleach into the air?"

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

"I don't know," the Doctor said. He took a whiff of the air. "But that's it, nothing else hiding behind it, no drugs or gas."

Well, no drug or gas that the Doctor could detect anyway. And while he liked to think Jack's presence helped temper his more egotistical side, he might've offhandedly thought, in that moment, that if he couldn't detect it, the drug or gas was probably not worth detecting at all.

Bleach smell in the air. Why would someone do that? "You can't clean the air with bleach," the Doctor thought aloud. "But you can make it smell like you did."

Another elf laughed, and then there was the sudden, squealing laugh of a child. An actual child, running past them and picking up a bag that had been discarded.

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

"To cover something up," Jack started to say. "Make it--"

But he stopped as the child ran past. Stopped and turned his head to watch. Confused.

Shortly behind the child was another, and then an exasperated parent shouting for them to slow down.

Jack took a tentative step forward and glanced around the corner. Ahead of them were people. Lots of people and all milling around as though they'd been there all along. Running in and out of shops with arms full of bags.

"Okaaay..." he said, confused as he looked back to the Doctor. "Is that it? That can't be it, right? That's never it."

Behind them a projection screen fired up and a blonde woman appeared on it, speaking in an accent that was almost American, and a smile that was widely false, she spoke Shoppers, welcome back to floor seventeen. We apologise if the cleaning cycle caused you any inconvenience. Please enjoy your day and of course, have a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

[rude-not-ginger.livejournal.com]

The Doctor slipped on his glasses to watch the screen. The screen flickered slightly, which sat wrongly with the Doctor. Technology was far too advanced to have such a strange flickering look. Maybe it was the planet, too overtaxed to have extra money to fix things.

"I didn't see any cleaning crew." He took a sniff of the air. "But if you weren't here, you wouldn't think that."

He ran to the stairs and glanced downwards. Plenty of people there. He looked up.

"If it's in a cycle, that means it's rotating. Which means we have another floor with empty bags and half-rung transactions somewhere. And I think..."

[quitehomoerotic.livejournal.com]

"But it does look clean," Jack pointed out, stepping over to the Doctor with his hands shoved into his pockets.

"I mean, last time we were here there were cups on the floor and bits of rubbish. Look at it now. Clean as a whistle."

Jack followed behind the Doctor and nodded, a finger extended outwards for emphasis as he talked. "Floor eighteen," he said, finishing the Doctor's sentiment for him. "Onwards and upwards, Doctor?"

He asked the question and didn't wait for an answer as he started up the stairs. Beside him, hoards of people were making their way down. In fact he was the only one heading the other way.